I heart Dog Star Daily

February 14, 2010

And Dog Star Daily hearts me  — or at least my book — back.

Co-created by the renowned Dr. Ian Dunbar and Kelly Gorman Dunbar, the site is home to some of the world’s top dog training and behavior experts, including Dr. Nicholas Dodman, Patricia McConnell, and Suzanne Clothier, as well as such up-and-comers (and, okay, Twitter pals) Eric Goebelbecker (@DogSpelledFwd; www.dogspelledforward.com), Nicole S. Silvers (@SilverSkyk9; http://silverskyk9.com) and Erica Young (@WorkThatDog).

So imagine my delight to find the following in the February 2010 Monthly Woof newsletter:

Edie Jarolim’s new book, “Am I Boring My Dog” addresses all sorts of questions about choosing and living with a dog. But this is no ordinary dry, informational dog book. The humorous and conversational tone makes this the most palatable dog book in ages. It’s an excellent book. I’ve never seen anything quite like it. “Am I Boring My Dog” is extremely thorough and covers an interesting and unique array of questions that pop up when one gets a dog for the first time. Questions I’ve never seen addressed anywhere else. This book is a must-have resource for anyone contemplating getting a dog, all first-time dog owners, dog professions, and every dog-lover in general; really it’s a book for anyone who wants to do the very best for their dog.

Read the rest of the review and newsletter here.

And yes, I saved this post for Valentine’s Day. What better occasion for a love fest?

Speaking of which, since you’re already here, why not take my Valentine’s Day poll?

Posted by Edie Jarolim
Posted in Am I Boring My Dog | Tagged , , , , , , | 9 Comments

And the contest winner is…

December 14, 2009

This was tough. Really tough. I was wowed by the thoroughness of many of the comments — not to mention the graciousness of all of them. Not a single person said anything mean about me or Frankie that I had to remove. In fact, you were all wonderfully encouraging about my writing (Frankie’s adorableness was a given).

I knew the picture issue would come up.  So this is an explanation, not an excuse. I’ve mentioned the camera curse before  (see Our Doggies, Ourselves). Sure enough, in keeping with the curse tradition, my camera was stolen (along with my laptop and a bunch of other things. But still…).  I did buy a new one, finally, and you all inspired me to take it out on the trail yesterday to practice. I didn’t get a good picture of Frankie, who rarely moves far enough away from me when we’re outside to get a full body view, but I was able to capture a handsome fox terrier who belongs to Jim, one of the trail regulars.

Frankie's acquaintance, Chuy

Frankie's acquaintance, Chuy

So I promise, more pictures.

I once had a Twitter button but it fell off and I don’t remember how to sew it back on.

Okay, I’m procrastinating. Like I said, it was really tough to choose a winner, and I thank you all for your contributions. It came down to three finalists, Rebecca, Pat Steer, and GoPetFriendly, listed here in the order in which they submitted their comments. They were all immensely useful in their specificity about technical issues. But I finally chose Pat — yes, you can call me Edie, and I’ll call you Pat — because:

  • I liked her referral to another site that described the pain of the process of revamping a blog.
  • She was the first one to help me make the connection that putting a Twitter feed on my blog functioned as a substitute for blogging every day. I’d always thought it was redundant, and a bit of overkill — do my blog readers really have to know what I thought about the ending of Dexter? — but suddenly that little “click” went off: Ah, more content on my blog without having to blog. That’s a good thing. It does mean I’ll have to be more conscious about my tweeting, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing, either.
  • She has just finished three — count ‘em, three! — blog revamps and really needs a bit of humor in her life, which I hope Am I Boring My Dog will provide (Oh Favorite Niece  — a.k.a. Only Niece Who Reads My Blog –  is that still too much of a plug?)

Incidentally, I just checked out Pat’s revamped Dog Trainer’s Log site, which I linked to with her name, above. It looks amazing, so she is also an inspiration. Hmm… How about I let you use Pimp My Blog for a ProBlogger discussion, Pat, and I use the same WordPress theme as you used?

Posted by Edie Jarolim
Also posted in Book giveaway contest | Tagged , , , | 9 Comments

Weekend Win-a-Book Contest: Blog 911

December 12, 2009

Life lessons are sometimes ambiguous. Yes, my failed foray into bells-and-whistles SEO/SEM technology taught me that there’s no substitute for solid writing and communication with readers. A blog is only as good as its content and its bond with a like-minded audience.

But it also made me aware that it’s tough to reach that like-minded audience without user-friendly blog technology. I definitely need to update Will My Dog Hate Me.

Thus this new contest, which will run for the weekend: The morning of December 12 through the evening of December 13. Go to the comments section and tell me what works for you on this blog — literally and figuratively — and what doesn’t. How I can improve the format — social media buttons? page length and post length? feeds? — and the content. Tell me what you’d like to see more of, what could go (except for Frankie). Share features from your favorite blogs, including your own, that I might consider adding to mine.

Amazon copyThe person that sends the most thoughtful/useful comment(s) — there’s no need to stop at one — who makes it clear that he or she has given this some real thought,  wins a copy of Am I Boring My Dog. Just in time for the holidays. I’ll inscribe it to the people — and dogs — of your choice, and send it directly to you or to its intended recipient.  If you’re in the U.S. or Canada, I’ll send it first class, not book rate. (Sorry my UK and Aussie pals; in your case it’s slow boat!)

Of course I reserve the right not to publish anything nasty. Mean comments about Frankie are immediate disqualifiers.

Is this a way to get people to read my blog? You bet — and an easy, low tech way at that. But consider the bonus, if you’re a blogger. It’s a good exercise in considering what you like on your own blog, what does or doesn’t work for you.

Incidentally, I was going to call this contest “Pimp My Blog,” but thought I might be pushing my luck, given my recent “What Would Frankie Do?” post. So there’s another topic to consider commenting on: Where do you  — that is me — draw the line between being interesting and opinionated and being offensive enough to put off people who might benefit from your opinions if they were presented differently?

Also posted in Book giveaway contest, dog blogging | Tagged , | 16 Comments

I’m the answer to Cesar Millan? Why, thanks!

December 6, 2009

[originally posted November 27th, 2009]

It’s Black Friday, and in the spirit of unbridled commerce, I figured I’d shamelessly promote my new book, Am I Boring My Dog? Why buy a copy, you ask? Because you will be showing your advocacy for positive, dog friendly training and learning how to keep adopted dogs from being returned to the pound.

Hey, I didn’t make those claims. Tim Vanderpool, the reviewer at the Tucson Weekly says:

While Millan’s approach has landed him gobs of press, the take-home message remains troubling: Must all dog owners manhandle their peaceful pooches into submission?

My answer? Skip the trendy Millan, and pick up a copy of Am I Boring My Dog? And 99 Other Things Every Dog Wishes You Knew. Authored by pet specialist and longtime Tucsonan Edie Jarolim, this smart and funny book replaces hype with refreshing common sense. Don’t be deceived by its airy, entertaining tone; Jarolim is serious about dogs, and her book is, too. It’s a mark of her skill that you come away with more doggie knowledge than you’d bargained for, all expertly tucked among the chuckles.

And

This clever, concise book…should be mandatory reading for anyone planning to adopt a pooch and keep it off the adoption line.

To read the rest of the review, click here. And while you’re on the Weekly’s site, don’t miss the same writer’s excellent — if grim — cover story on Pima Animal Care Center.

It’s odd: As far as I know, the reviewer has never looked at my blog and in any case would have turned in the review before my Make Fun of Dog Dominance Theory Day post. And I never mention Cesar Millan by name in my book. Must be something in the air…

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So your kid wants a dog…

December 5, 2009

[originally posted November 16, 2009]

Forget violence and lewd language. In many households, it’s films like Hotel for Dogs, Beverly Hills Chihuahua, and 101 Dalmatians (in any version) that require parental controls. All are dangerous viewing for families unwilling, or unable, to get their offspring a dog.

But even parents who are considering a furry pal for their kids should beware of films or ads depicting cute canines; the strong pet urges they awaken may be premature. Not all children are ready for the responsibility of taking care of a living creature, especially a high maintenance one like a dog.

Even two cute dalmatians can be dangerous

Even two cute dalmatians can be dangerous

How do you know if your child is ready for a dog?

  • If he or she is old enough to ask, that’s a start — “ask” being the operative word. Never get a dog for a kid who hasn’t requested one just because you think he is lonely or needs to learn responsibility. That would be the equivalent of using real babies rather than dolls or eggs in one of those teen anti-pregnancy programs that involves taking care of an infant for a week. Robotic dogs are now widely available, should such a lesson be your goal.
  • Take into account the circumstances that sparked the request. Wait at least three months after your child viewed the last dog movie.

In the meantime, try not to be swayed by the intense desire to stop the cajoling and whining that tend to accompany all pet requests. Inform your offspring that dogs are very sensitive to high-pitched sounds such as whining, and that you couldn’t possibly bring one into such an inhospitable environment.

  • Finally, ask yourself: Are you or anyone else in the family willing to take primary responsibility for the dog if your kid loses interest? If the answer is no, don’t get a dog. It would not only be horribly unfair to the neglected pup, but also to the child, who’ll come to associate dogs with nagging and yelling and, as a result, never want to have anything to do with the species later in life.

If you do decide your household is dog-ready:

  • Involve your child in the adoption/buying (from a reputable breeder, of course) process, thereby ensuring a match of temperaments and creating an emotional bond.
  • Avoid bringing a dog home during the holidays, a sure recipe for disaster. (See my earlier post, A dog as a holiday gift? Think again)

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t let your child associate getting a dog with the holidays, which is one way to ensure better memories of the season than most of us have. Either go together to get the dog in advance, stressing that this is a holiday gift, or give the child an IOU — perhaps tied to a stuffed animal — promising an excursion to get a pup in the new year. If your kid can’t deal with the concept of advance or deferred gratification — or does really creepy things to the stuffed animal– then she isn’t ready for a dog.

  • Avoid family trips to stores that sell puppies. It’s tough enough for a grownup to remember the greater good of shutting down puppy mills, which tend to be the source of pet store dogs, when faced with the pathos of a small, squirmy cutie in a cage. Don’t expect your child to be able to grasp this difficult concept — or forgive you for dragging him away from that wagging tail.

Adapted from Am I Boring My Dog: And 99 Things Every Dog Wishes You Knew.

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Werewolves, Whisperers, and Mensches

December 5, 2009

[originally posted November 6, 2009]

Far be it from me to suggest I don’t love plain old good reviews of Am I Boring My Dog; I do. But sometimes a write up comes along that teaches me something new about what I wrote, putting it into a larger context that hadn’t occurred to me. That was the case with Diane Schmidt’s “Be a Mensch and a Good Dog Owner,” on the Albuquerque Judaism Examiner site; it first appeared in the Gallup Independent on October 31. She starts off by saying:

Secretly guilt-ridden that you could never achieve the successes of Cesar Millan, Dog Whisperer? Chagrined and embarrassed by your dog’s behaviors in public? Unsure if you are even worthy of canine affection? If you have been guiltily suffering in silence, look out Cesar, because there’s a new book for dog-owners from Alpha Books, publishers of the Complete Idiot’s Guides, that should spawn a whole new line of how-to books: how-to-not-feel-guilty books. It’s definitely for those of us raised on Dr. Spock. Yes, that’s us, a whole generation raised by guilty mothers who could never spank us and now we aren’t quite sure how to manage the “I’m your pack-leader” alpha dominance business with our furry friends, who by the way are not furry children; children actually are, in fact, hair-challenged dogs, as we learn in ‘Am I Boring My Dog?’ by Edie Jarolim.

Jarolim is originally from Brooklyn, where, according to her introduction, she says Lassie wasn’t exactly down at the corner deli begging for pastrami hand-outs. She has lived in Tucson now for over 15 years and she got a dog, Frankie. She wants you to know that a lot of folks who grew up in New York City and surrounds were not allowed to have dogs, and while she doesn’t mention it, we’ve also noticed some never really learned to drive, either. Nevertheless, New Yorkers get it in their heads to move out west; they eventually get houses with yards and cowboy boots and they get dogs, but some things can never change, such as feeling guilty about everything.

Naturally I’m thrilled to be considered an antidote to Cesar Millan — who, by the way, I never mention in my book; I just advocate positive or “dog-friendly” training methods. I was even more pleased to learn that, after reading my book, Schmidt decided to substitute a halter for the choke collar (you’ll have to read the rest of the review to learn about that).

Teddy harnessed text arabic

But what got me thinking was the allusion to the book as part of the zeitgeist of a generation raised on Dr. Spock (also Mr. Spock, but that’s another story). Why wouldn’t the progeny of non-spankers have problems with physical punishment? Choking dogs doesn’t come naturally to us — and that’s a good thing.

It got better, thanks to one of those serendipitous (woo woo?) events. I didn’t get a copy of the original print edition of the review until yesterday, when I discovered that it ran opposite the comic pages. This made me very happy, because everyone — yes, I include myself — looks at the comics. And then I started browsing that page, and stopped short. What are the odds that the following strip by Dana Summers should have appeared opposite the review?

bound and gagged

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Remembrance of Pets Past: Dia de los Muertos

October 30, 2009

Halloween has never been my holiday.

It might have had something to do with my mother’s dislike of what she considered a religious — and not one of ours — observance, her reluctance to take me on the rounds of my Brooklyn apartment building (which wasn’t especially kid-friendly anyway).  It might have had to do with the fact that I was a chubette when I was growing up and didn’t look good in a tutu. Not unrelated: My mother always discouraged me from eating whatever candy I accumulated because, as I’ve mentioned, I was a chubette.

In recent and somewhat svelter years, I’ve still had no interest in coming up with a costume; I have enough trouble pretending to be a grown-up on the rare occasion when I’m required to look “professional.”  The only Halloween party I recall with fondness  — or recall at all for that matter — was the one, post-divorce, when I wore the floor-length, fancy dress I’d gotten married in. I strapped a pillow around my waist and went as a pregnant bride.

But if I’ve never been crazy about Halloween, when I moved to the Southwest I found a (semi-) related holiday that really speaks to me: Dia de Los Muertos, or the Day of the Dead. It involves Mexican folk art, sugary snacks, and the notion that our departed loved ones can return home for a day to enjoy their favorite foods with us. What’s not to like?

Of course, the breaking of bread with the dead is the way to bring them back into our lives for a time, the better to remember why we mourn them. And in my dog-obsessed circles, we recognize that mourning pets is as important — perhaps more important, because it’s generally less societally acceptable — as mourning  humans.

Day of the Dead Floorcloth/Altar by VerveInteriors

Day of the Dead Floorcloth/Altar by VerveInteriors on Etsy

You probably wouldn’t want to put food on the floorcloth pictured above, but I imagine a picnic cloth on which you might lay down a feast that your dog would have loved —   cheeseburgers, say, and buffalo wings — but was never allowed to eat in life because of the high fat content and the fear of splintering bones.

And those who live in the Tucson area should consider going over to the Global Arts Gallery in nearby Patagonia (no, not the one in South America) on Sunday, November 1 (noon to 5), where there will be an offrenda (altar) upon which to place photographs and other remembrances of pets past. There will also be a show/sale of the collages, paintings, and prints of Donna Reibslager. And food.

Cancion. Collage by Donna Reibslager

Cancion. Collage by Donna Reibslager

Even if you can’t go this Sunday, be sure to stop by another time for the wonderful folk art, jewelry, and clothing from all over the world.  I would say this even if the owner, Adrienne Halpert, weren’t my friend and wasn’t going to host a signing for Am I Boring My Dog in her gallery on November 27. My first love was for the store, and I only got to know Adrienne and her pups, Paco and Goomba because I went back so often.

Paco and Goomba, Global Art Gallery's pups

Paco and Goomba, Global Art Gallery's pups

Posted by Edie Jarolim
Also posted in Dog mourning | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Doggie dilemma: How do you tell your friends…?

October 27, 2009

Twice a week, Frankie and I take our morning walk with my friend Jackie and her miniature poodle, Angel. Dogwise, it’s a perfect match. Angel is the only pup I know who is shyer than Frankie. The two of them generally ignore each other, but occasionally one sniffs the other’s butt furtively and then immediately skitters away. I’ve never seen two dogs so similar when it comes to nongreetings.

Angel (pre-shoes) & Frankie, ignoring each other as usual

Angel (pre-shoes) & Frankie, ignoring each other as usual

But I digress.

All was copacetic on our walks until a few weeks ago, when Jackie decided to buy Angel some pink shoes.

Now as anyone who’s spent two minutes on this blog knows, I’m not generally opposed to canine footwear, especially when it’s functional — for example, when the sidewalks are too hot or they’re dosed with snow-melting corrosives. Angel’s shoes, in contrast, were intended only to keep Jackie’s house and her clothing clean.

I kind of wished that Jackie wouldn’t perpetuate frou frou poodle stereotypes. Still, Angel looked sweet and as long as she was comfortable being shod, I had no problem with it.

The other day, however, I noticed Angel walking with a bit of a limp. I bent down to investigate and saw that Angel’s shoes were attached to her halter with string, which had gotten tangled on one side.

When I asked Jackie about the string, she explained that Angel had almost lost one of her shoes. She wanted to make sure they stayed on.

Now mind you, Jackie is a very kind, good-hearted person: She wouldn’t dream of doing anything that she felt would harm any dog, and especially not her sweet girl.  She was convinced that the string wasn’t interfering with Angel’s comfort.

I wasn’t.

In fact, an Old-woman-who-swallowed-a-fly scenario began running through my head.

Would Jackie next add clips to the string to make sure it didn’t get tangled? Put socks over the clips so they won’t rub? Boots over the socks…?

I didn’t mention all this to Jackie, just mildly suggested that Angel’s gait seemed encumbered.

I have more clout these days than I used to, what with having written a book about dog care. But Jackie was adamant that Angel was doing ok.

I didn’t feel strongly enough to argue. But it left me wondering. At what point — and how — do I intervene without insulting my friend?

Also posted in Functional dog clothing, Pet dressing, Responsible dog care | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Frankie: The first five years

October 24, 2009

Yesterday was the fifth anniversary of adopting Frankie, my first dog, ever.  In honor of that occasion, I was going to write a paean to the joys of life with a dog. Not coincidentally, however, the day Frankie was brought over to my house –  in rescuer parlance, his “forever home,” a phrase I detest not only for its Hallmark soppiness, but also its inherent falsity; nothing, not even diamonds, is forever  — was also my birthday. Much as I love writing, it’s also work, something I was determined not to do on my birthday this year.

I also thought of spending the day with Frankie but he’s really not very sentimental  and wouldn’t have appreciated the gesture (except in the general sense of liking to have me around to cater to him).  He would, on the other hand, have been very annoyed to discover that I put on my other hat, food writer, and drove up to Scottsdale for an amazing lunch at Michael Mina’s Bourbon Steak (hint: Kobe beef and sirloin were involved) in which he didn’t partake. And hell no, there were no leftovers.

So the task of doing a retrospective fell to me today.

I then contemplated writing about what each year of our lives together would signify — you know, like kibble for the first year being the equivalent of a human paper anniversary — but soon started wondering whether I needed to factor in the seven dog years equals one human year formula, which has been modified anyway. This began to involve higher math.

More to the point, the idea of our anniversary described in human romantic terms began to seem a bit creepy. I also feel that way about the term “pet parent,” incidentally, with its implications of interspecies interbreeding. If I am Frankie’s “mom” — a term I never used to refer to my actual mother — who is his “dad”? What would I have had to do with him and why don’t I recall the occasion? And why doesn’t Frankie resemble me in the slightest?

So then it occurred to me that I addressed this question in — shameless self promotion alert — my new book, AM I BORING MY DOG.

2. Will getting a dog change my life dramatically?

Yes, and irrevocably– but in a good way. Unless you have a tiny, flinty heart, in which case you shouldn’t inflict your mean self on a dog or any other living creature.

It struck me that I used to worry that maybe I did have a tiny, flinty heart, that I was incapable of the sacrifice involved in caring for another creature. After all, I’d never wanted a human child (yes, I’m an unnatural woman; get over it).

I was wrong.

Not only did the depth of my feeling for this funny alien creature throw me for a loop; I was also surprised by my ability to cope with the day-to-day details of his care. To use an extreme example, when I discovered Frankie had diabetes first I threw myself on the floor and wept. And then I got on with the task of dealing with it.  Am I crazy about giving him shots and fussing over his diet? No way. But I sure am pleased to discover that caretaking is not beyond my capabilities.

Hmmm. Even if the term gives me the heebie jeebies, maybe I was cut out to be a dog mom after all.

Also posted in Dog Health Care, Dog humor, dog rescue | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Will My Dog Hurt Me?

October 12, 2009

Don’t worry. I’m not going to regale you with tales of vicious mastiffs who turn on their owners in a fit of rage. Nor do I intend to debunk the notion of unconditional love (though people sometimes forget that dogs don’t always demonstrate it — say, when you interrupt their mealtimes).

Rather, I’d like to warn you about the dangers of CRIs©: Canine Related Injuries.*

As I mentioned in my last post, I decided to stroll down memory lane in honor of the fifth anniversary of Frankie’s adoption. Naturally, all kinds of guilt-inducing experiences from our first year together came to mind: How I took Frankie to the dog park to “socialize” him (he spent the entire time hiding behind my leg); how I  put him in a shallow water fountain to cool him off on a hot day (that look of shocked reproach was enough to prevent me from ever doing it again); how I made him walk with a burr in his foot because I didn’t think to examine his paws and thought he was being stubborn (that memory still hurts me!)…

But I recalled that this blog is, after all, a guilt-free zone, and I honestly didn’t know any better. Frankie forgave me — at least he didn’t dwell on any of my gaffes–  so I’m forgiving myself.

Instead, then, this is a cautionary tale about the opposite problem,  a bit of stupidity that didn’t distress Frankie but caused me harm. To wit: When I first got Frankie, I used to let him sit in my lap and rest his little head on my hand while I was typing. I loved it. He was my furry muse, a warm calming presence.

Until I began getting shooting pains in my left wrist.

Oh right. Typing with a weight on your hand might not be the best idea. I banished Frankie from my lap, but it was too late. I was diagnosed with tendinitis.**

Frankie with head aimed at my wrist

Frankie with head aimed at my wrist

Two cortisone shots, a number of wrist braces, and several months of physical therapy later, I recovered, though I still get twinges in my left wrist.

I suppose I should find some solace in the fact that I’m not alone in my stupidity — or clumsiness.

According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), an average of 76,500 people per year trip over their dogs. Most incidents occur during walks, when 31.3% reported that they “fell or tripped over the dog” and another 21.2% admitted they were “pushed or pulled by the dog.” These statistics, based on data from emergency room visits, likely represent only a fraction of actual CRIs© because, according to the CDC, “many people don’t seek treatment after injuring themselves in accidents involving their pets.”

Or they seek treatment outside of emergency rooms. The physical therapist who worked on my wrist told me that she has seen multiple cases of dislocated shoulders caused by sudden and vigorous tugging on the leash.

Most CRIs© can be prevented by training — both of you and your dog. Work on ways to get your dog to stop tugging at the leash and to remind yourself to watch for underfoot pups. More difficult is to train yourself to use common sense — say, when it comes to refusing your pup his chosen headrest.

*For some reason, the publisher of Am I Boring My Dog wouldn’t allow me to put copyright symbols in my book, where I first claim the name for this class of injuries (something about house style). But it’s my blog — and my house. So there.

**This is actually a DRSI© (Dog Related Stress Injury),  a subcategory of the CRIs©, which themselves are a subcategory of PRIs© (Pet Related Injuries).

Update: I see I’m going to have to blog about the health benefits of pets — they’re vast –  lest people be put off from adopting dogs based on the stories in my comments section.

Also, by serendipity, I saw two useful posts related to at least one type of DRSI on one of my favorite blogs, Dog Spelled Forward: This one about a command you can use to redirect your dog on a leash, this one about a harness that helps prevent pulling.

Posted by Edie Jarolim
Also posted in Dog Impact on Human Health, dog training | Tagged , , , , , , | 12 Comments